Hungry, hungry hippos

England tomorrow, yay! My life has been so colourful and intense lately, that it's beyond mindblowing. The pace with which things develop is very, very high. It's remarkable, how everything varies like a diagram of your heart activity on the computer.. Once it's very mellow and cool, and the very next moment you're busting your arse with work and everything just collides, and all the crap you can possibly think of, gathers on one little nerve cell of yours. And when the latter one happens, you fail to see any positivity in life whatsoever. And you just neglect the little things that could, in theory (and in practice also), bring you back to the brighter side of life. Why is it that we don't cling onto these things? And haven't you noticed that the 'why' questions are the hardest of all? When we most need something that is in our reach, why don't we reach for it? Is it some sort of a pride thing keeping us back, telling us that we have to crawl out of everything ourselves, just to prove our self-efficacy?
I feel a bit emptier today, than usual. It's not any kind of a negative emptiness in me, just the comprehension of the indispensable.. Sucks to realise that your life is controlled by some external elements that are always there, that you can do nothing about, and that arranges everything surrounding. Of course, some things come down to your own decisions also, but if to choose something over something... which one to take: the one that suggests contentment in longrun, maybe with some withdrawals... or something that is absolutely pure pleasure, but only ephemeral, unrepeated? The only comfort and consolation I see in this question is the thought of believing in fate. Shouldn't everything that happens, happen for a reason explained somewhere higher from the colloquial and banal, literally down-to-earth action? Who knows. But it sure diminishes the anguish caused by the inevitable and imminent.
When all is said and done, all that's left, is just to accept everything, try and make best out of it and not to stress about it. Everything goes as it's supposed to. I presume.
England is going to be a blast. We're gonna rock those brits so hard, it's not even funny;)!